


Into the Stormy Sea

by mushembra



Series: Darla 'One-Shot' Cunningham, Sniper for Hire [3]
Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout 4
Genre: Anger, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Arguing, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fear, Fluff, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-09
Updated: 2016-03-22
Packaged: 2018-05-25 15:26:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,447
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6200593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mushembra/pseuds/mushembra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The only chance Darla has of finding the Institute, and her son, his to venture into The Glowing Sea.<br/>She's hesitant to venture into such dangerous territory, but MacCready is outright angry about it.<br/>Rather, his fear is twisting him into knots, and he just can't seem to sort his shit out.</p><p>A short, four chapter work of Darla, MacCready, and their feels through the trials and tribulations through a hellish landscape, and through their minds.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Before the Storm

**Author's Note:**

> So with this playthrough, I just got around to going to The Glowing Sea, and in game, RIGHT before I crossed the border, Darla and the Mac man had their little moment with his final affinity speech, and so this fic was born. I was going to condense it into three chapters, but I really wanted to devote a chapter to the argument they would have had BEFORE they left.  
> This is mostly going to to be hurt/comfort, angst, fluff, lovey-dovey drabble, but there WILL be a smut chapter. Oh trust me, I'm already planning it in there. So be excited for that you sinful souls!  
> I'll try not to take too many days between each chapter, but I can't make any guarantees. Certainly this should all be posted up within a week, but we'll see how my health and attention-span is doing
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

This was a bad idea. A really bad idea. The most idiotic, fucking moronic idea Darla has come up with. Sure, lets just waltz into The Glowing Sea like it’s no big fucking deal. What harm could come of it? It’s not like there’s a possibility of them going feral or just having their skin peeled off in under a minute. What could possibly go wrong? Christ, this was his third cigarette in a row. MacCready’s nerves were frayed, and he felt anger boiling in his chest, a churning storm that was growing in intensity. Or was it fear? Or both? How could she be so god damn stupid? He glanced down the street, jaw set tight. She was just chatting it up with Mr. Good Boy Preston, like nothing was fucking wrong. Oh but there was so much wrong here. How could she be so calm?

Darla waved a quick goodbye to her friend, then started heading in his direction, hands in the pockets of her jeans, whistling some cheery little tune that was enough to make him sick. He hadn’t been this sour with her in some time, not since they had become good friends and MacCready started admitting to himself that there may be something more between them. But there was a line that was crossed, and he was never someone to just sit back and pretend things were all hunky-dory. Sure, his big fat mouth has gotten him into trouble plenty of times, but some things just needed to be said.

“Righto, so we need to get to planning, talking strategy, hashing out...well who the hell pissed in your Sugar Bombs?”

Darla had been blissfully ignorant, or at least pretending to be it seemed, that he was so worked up about all of this. Did she even care? Sure as hell didn’t seem like she did. She was always (at least of late) asking his opinion in all matters concerning their jobs, but she was dead set on going to The Glowing Sea, despite his protesting. Hell, she practically waved off his concerns, and that just wasn’t going to cut it. MacCready needed words with her, and he needed to say his piece now.

“What the _hell_ are you thinking?”

“Whoa there buddy, watch that potty mouth of--”

“No jokes, Darla! I want you to shut the fuck up and listen!”

That sobered her up awfully quick. Darla’s smile fell from her face, and she took that defensive mom stance she loved to take so much when she was in a heated argument. Man, she must have practiced that for Shaun or some shit. She could be pretty intimidating to look at when her face went stoney and serious, but there was no backing down from what he started.

“This is a suicide mission. You want us to just walk on up into a death trap, and you make it sound like this is just any old job, like we’re just going after raiders, or saving another sorry ass settler who doesn’t know the butt-end of a gun from the barrel. All for some scientist who just _might_ be there!”

MacCready could already tell he was treading dangerous waters. That look of stone started cracking into anger, and the more he talked, the more he swore those eyes were going to start shooting lasers right through him. He should shut up, shut his damn mouth right now, but he just couldn’t cool his thoughts. His mind was awhirl with so much emotion, some of it he just couldn’t sort through, couldn’t bear, and he couldn’t get it under control. The words were starting to tumble out of his mouth, and no amount of biting his tongue would stop them.

“MacCready, this is the only way we’re going to find the Institute. We don’t have a whole lot of fucking options. Trust me, walking into a sea of radiation is the furthest thing from a vacation for me, but I _have_ to do this.”

“Oh you _have_ to, do you? Really? And what if this Virgil fucker isn’t even there, huh? Then what? What if your little planning and preparing goes wrong? What if, what if, WHAT IF?!”

MacCready’s face felt warm, and he knew it must be red. Darla’s was just the same. They were both erupting. That was the problem when it came to arguments between the two of them; they were both just as stubborn, and depending on the argument, could be just as hot-headed.

“Are you _really_ fucking asking me to reconsider going out there, huh? I can’t even believe you! I thought you of all people would understand!”

No, he didn’t understand. He didn’t, because he couldn’t, because right now he was being selfish. Right now, all he was thinking about was Darla’s safety, the fact that she was risking her life, the fact that he could lose her. A life without Darla was a life that would be so barren it would drive him mad. It took every ounce of willpower and love for Duncan that MacCready had to carry on after Lucy passed, but if he had to go through losing someone so dear to him all over again, it may very well break him beyond the point of no return. Oh christ it made him sick just thinking about it.

“You don’t get it, do you? Honestly, I think our chances are really damn slim of finding this guy. Then what would all of this work have been for? Nothing! Fucking nothing, boss! You’ll be rotting out there and you’ll be no closer to finding the god-damn Institute! This whole hair-brained plan is a mistake, and maybe agreeing to go with you was also a mistake…”

Boy did MacCready regret those words. The second he said them he regretted him. Darla’s rage exploded, but worse than that was the deep hurt in her eyes. She lurched forward, hot, angry tears stinging her eyes and blurring her vision. If it weren’t for the fact that he had jumped back, MacCready was sure she’d be choking him out right about now.

“You know what fuckass?! Fine! Don’t fucking go with me! I’ll take someone else! Hell, I’ll go _alone_ if I have to! If I had another option, I’d fucking take it. But this is the _only_ way I have even a _sliver_ of hope of seeing my son again. I helped you get that stupid cure for Duncan, and I thought you of all people would understand! But I guess I pegged you wrong. You really are just a selfish prick out for himself! Well, as of right now, I relieve you of your service. Now get the fuck out of here!”

MacCready didn’t even have a chance to choke out an apology from his tight throat. Darla was already stalking off for her house like a woman bent on destroying everything in her path. Fuck, now why did he have to say that? Why did he have to be so bad at this shit? Fear, worry, he had never been good with dealing with such ugly and deep emotions. They always came out in anger, and that’s part of why he came across as an ungrateful, cold, unwavering douchebag. He was king of misunderstandings, and he just stepped right into the doozy of all misunderstandings. Christ, he wasn’t even sure he could make up for his sorry ass mouth. Guilt now weighed heavy on his shoulders, and MacCready found he could no longer stand. He lowered himself to the ground, shakily taking out a cigarette and his lighter, a numbness washing over him. The anger came from a dark place, a place of fear for losing the woman who had saved him from himself when all hope seemed lost. And now, he may very well have pushed her out of his life all on his own.

\--------------

MacCready hadn’t the slightest clue how many cigarettes he’s burned through today by this point. Too many to be sure. He hadn’t moved from where he sat since the fight, trying to give Darla the space to calm down so that he could try to have a rational conversation with her. Not that he deserved that chance after what he fucking said to her. The more he thought about the whole argument, the more he was disgusted with himself. He was practically begging her to throw away all thought of saving her son for the sake of his peace of mind. How could he possibly be so selfish? Yes, he lost Lucy, and yes, he didn’t want to lose someone else. But Darla lost her husband, her son, her way of life. She has lost so much, and given so much more. She needed answers, and hell, she deserved them. Who was he to try and take that away from her?

_MacCready you have got to be the biggest fucking moron in the Commonwealth…_

A loud crash coming from Darla’s home startled him from his thoughts, and MacCready was quick to get to his feet and rush to the doorway. He was met with a living space in complete tatters. Furniture was broken and scattered everywhere, all of that hard work undone in mere moments. A toaster went flying past his head, and it was only because of his quick reflexes that he was able to duck and keep from getting pegged square in the face.

“Darla!”

Darla was on an absolute rampage. Her face was red, contorted from anger, pain, and sadness. It was almost more than MacCready could take. He was the reason all of these horrible things surfaced in her, but instead of running and allowing this all to sort itself out, hiding from the problem he had caused, he decided he needed to be the reason she was able to bounce back. He was rather quick on his feet, inching ever closer to the raging woman. The closer he got, the more determined she seemed to actually hit her mark with these makeshift projectiles. Ok, that was a kitchen knife. Not cool. Not cool at all.

“GO! GO AWAY! I TOLD YOU TO FUCKING LEAVE YOU MISERABLE PRICK!”

Yeah, he deserved that. He deserved every nasty remark she could fling at him. Because at the end of the day, he was the reason she had been reminded of all of her suffering. Why didn’t he keep his mouth shut? But still he persisted, ducking and dodging, trying to get within arm’s reach of Darla. It wasn’t an easy task, seeing as how she was hurling shit at him and backing away. Thankfully, she was backing herself into a corner of her kitchen, and eventually she ran out of room to run and things to hurl at him. That’s when MacCready made his move. He rushed forward, taking a hold of Darla from behind, wrapping his arms tightly around her, rendering her arms immobile and useless. She didn’t like that in the least.

“Let me go! Let me fucking go!”

“Darla...Darla...ssshhh…”

MacCready said nothing else. All he did was repeat her name, a soft whisper on his lips. He was trying to call Darla back to him, trying to get her to calm down. The first couple of minutes showed no success. She continued to thrash and scream in his arms, giving her best effort to break free from her bondage. But MacCready’s patience won out, and her struggles started to die down. Darla simply didn’t have the energy to continue fighting, especially with that kind, pleading voice whispering in her ear. The anger gave way to a deep sadness, so the screams gave way to broken sobs, which he wasn’t sure was much better. Hearing that pain made his heart clench. Fuck it hurt.

“Darla, I want you to listen to me.”

The sobs quieted, but Darla just couldn’t get herself under control. MacCready held the poor woman close, feeling how her body shook as she released her pain. He placed his lips near her ear, speaking to her in a soft and endearing tone, a tone of voice he hadn’t used for a soul since Lucy. God damn he had to it bad for this woman.

“What I said...I...I said it because…”

The lump in MacCready’s throat almost prevented him from continuing, but she needed to hear this, and he really needed to get this shit off of his chest.

“I’m scared. I’m scared of losing...of losing you. I know why you want to go; need to go. Shaun could be trapped in that place, and I sure as hell wouldn’t want Duncan to be stuck there. I just...I…”

MacCready swallowed the lump in his throat. Fuck his mouth was dry. The words were shriveling up. No, no, he needed to get them out. Was his heart supposed to be slamming this quickly in his chest?

“I can’t lose you...I’ve already lost Lucy, and I was so close to losing Duncan. I...I didn’t think I’d let anyone close enough to me again to be this afraid but...you just had to snake your way in, didn’t you?”

No response. MacCready had hoped for even a little snort. He really hurt her, didn’t he? Humor was usually a good way to draw good ol’ Darla out of the dark recesses of her mind. Good fucking going you idiot. He let a heavy sigh push through his lips, closing his eyes, feeling a tension headache start to creep through his skull. Well that was certainly the last thing he needed.

“I didn’t mean...I...christ, Darla, I don’t want you to give up on Shaun. That’s the last thing I want. I just...The Glowing Sea? I mean the odds of finding this guy are slim, and the odds of surviving are even slimmer. And the thought of seeing you being torn apart by god knows what out there...the same way I...I had to watch Lucy…”

MacCready could feel the tears sting in the corners of his eyes, and he didn’t want them to fall. He had to be strong for Darla, as he’s always had to be strong, since he was very young. The wasteland offered no time or space for weakness and pain. If you let that shit get to you, then people could take advantage of that and do you in. It’s why he always had to hold strong, so that just maybe someone else could have the room to have their moment of weakness. Since Darla stepped out of that damn vault, she had no room or time to grieve. She was thrown into this nightmare world and had to take it all in stride, or perish without the answers she desperately needed to find closure. He needed to be strong.

Suddenly, MacCready found himself in Darla’s arms, and it left him caught off guard. Darla never expected him to be strong for her, despite all of the silly assuming on the mercenary’s part. In fact, she wanted him to be there as proof that it was perfectly ok to feel this pain, to suffer, to hurt, yet move on and be strong and make a difference. But in this moment, holding each other up, this is exactly what the two of them needed. They’ve both had to be strong for so long, but right now, there was no judgment and no expectations. Just understanding and care. Just each other, and no one else. Having that support is what made the last couple of months possible.

“Darla I...I want to help you find Shaun. I want you to find Shaun. What I said...what I feel. It’s fucking selfish. I just...I can’t…”

“Ssshhh…”

Darla let her hand make soothing strokes over MacCready’s back, humming a wavering tune in his ear. Her crying had died down, but she couldn’t help the emotions that were overwhelming her. Neither could MacCready, who was allowing the hot tears to fall down his face, for one of the few times in his life, though his cries were silent by comparison. He bit into his lip, the taste of blood tainting his tongue as he stifled back the pain. How the fuck was this fair to her? Still being selfish. Yeah, this made him feel a whole lot better. And yet, for however guilty he felt for finally letting his pain out when she needed this moment to open up, a heavy weight fell off of his shoulders. It was finally out in the air. There it was. Darla finally knew just how much he cared. It was never supposed to be like this. She was his boss. He was just a hired gun. That was it, plain and simple. Point and shoot. That was the arrangement, wasn’t it? But that was no longer the reality.

“Mac...Robert...do you honestly think I’m not scared? I’m fucking terrified. I’ve thought the very same things myself. What if Virgil is dead? What if I don’t make it? What if this is all a waste of time? But...the thing is, I’ll never know if I don’t try. Shaun is out there somewhere, the Institute is out there somewhere, and I need to find them. This is...Shaun is the reason I stepped out of that vault in the first place. But…”

But? MacCready dared to turn his eyes up to Darla’s. She was looking down at him, a sparkle of endearment there that made his stomach turn flips. You’d think it’d comfort him, but it just made his heart slam faster against his rib cage. Jesus he was going to faint right there in her arms. How embarrassing would that be?

“I have more reasons to keep going now. I know this mission has risks, and I know it will be hard to plan out, and things could go horribly wrong. But I have reasons to be careful, to make it back. I’m the General of the Minutemen. I have people who depend on me. I...I…”

_I have someone I’d do anything to live on for._

Darla couldn’t utter her last thought. She got too tongue tied. Her face flushed a deep shade of red, and MacCready could almost guess what she might of said. His eyes darted to the floor, and though a smile didn’t creep to his tear-stained face, he felt a lightness filling him up, and it made him dizzy. Oh yeah, he was totally going to faint. Why couldn’t he say the right words? Why wouldn’t they just come out of his goddamn mouth? If there were ever a time to pipe up and admit he was crushing on his boss, this was the time, seeing as how they were about to start planning for a mission into an irradiated death trap, but the words just wouldn’t come out.

“Oiy, I’m a mess…”

Darla let a short laugh escape her lips, wiping the tears from her cheeks.

“Oh yeah, and I totally have my sh--myself together...come on, we’re both a mess. I won’t tell anyone. Secret’s safe with me…”

Another laugh, this one a little more genuine. The duo released each other, hands furiously trying to clear away all signs of their tears. That was one good thing about Darla; she wasn’t given to dragging out drama. Once everything was out in the air, she was just as ready as he was to move on from their little moment. It made things a little less awkward. Made him not feel quite so weird about not being good with this shit. Darla was good at getting it out there, but never one to dwell for too long. He always wondered why, since he figured a woman before the war would be much more given to such things, but he never thought to dig too much into it. All he’s ever had hinted to him was that her deceased husband, Nathan, wasn’t a very good man, but that was about it. A talk for another time.

“So...uh...I know I said you were sort of ‘fired’ but I uh...I hoped you…”

MacCready waved a dismissing hand, a playful smirk pulling to his lips.

“You should know by now, boss, it’s going to take a lot more than yelling to get me to hit the road.”

Darla returned the smirk, but he could see the relief in her eyes, part of her fearing that what she had said in kind would really drive him away.

“Good, because we have a whole hell of a lot of planning to do.”

“Oh, well that just sounds like a boat load of fun…”

“Hey there, mister, watch the sarcasm. I’m the boss, and what I say, goes!”

“Aiy, aiy, captain!”

MacCready feigned a silly salute, then the two of them walked out of Darla’s house laughing and chatting away. They both still held a lot of fear over the mission ahead, and of the future, but having each other at their sides, just maybe the future had the possibility of being a little less bleak.


	2. Storm Front

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Standing on the edge of the safe zone of The Glowing Sea, Darla and MacCready find themselves no longer able to keep their feelings a secret and confess their love for one another. It's now or never, and they just hope they can get through this journey alive to enjoy a possible future with one another.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, sorry about not getting this shit done when I said I would. I've been having alot of life issues, so I've been unable to get my writing hat on. I'm going to try to get this finished and wrapped up faster than it took for this chapter to come out, but I still have a lot going on...
> 
> That and I have other fics absorbing my mind that I want to write, so I might end up posting other things before this gets finished out
> 
> AS AN FYI! My next two chapters will contain smut for you sinful people out there, so at least you have that to look forward to

Well, here they were, on the edge of the safe zone bordering The Glowing Sea. It took two weeks of proper planning, stocking, and training to prepare for this trip, but being this close to this nightmarish spanse of land was making them both very nervous. MacCready and Darla were chatty all along the way as they usually were, the trek from Red Rocket quite the lengthy one. But the closer they got to the danger zone, the quieter they got, and now, no words were exchanged between the two. They were stuck in their own heads, fretting over their own worries, second guessing this whole idea again and again. MacCready swallowed a lump in his throat, glancing up at Darla, her face rather pale, eyes wide and unfocused.

“So...th-this is it, huh?”

“Yup...The Glowing Sea...a.k.a. No Man’s Land. Most people who dare to walk in, rarely come back out…”

Oh yeah, that’s what poor Darla needed to hear. He was just a ray of fucking sunshine and optimism, wasn’t he?

“But hey, we’ve beat the odds more times than I can count, so I think we’ll be fine...right?”

MacCready wasn’t quite sure if he was trying to reassure Darla or himself. The desolate expanse of land that lay before them was sparse, ominous clouds tinted with that sickening radioactive hue looming overhead. It was a storm that had been churning for about 200 years, and the eggheads guessed it would be hundreds if not thousands of years for the radioactivity to ebb enough for the storm to finally quiet once more. Thunder rolled through the air, and the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end. Man, he never liked storms, and from the look on her face, it seemed Darla wasn’t too fond of them, either. Seeing such fear made his stomach churn. He just wanted to hold her close and help chase it away, if only he could.

“We should double-check the hazmat suits for leaks before suiting up and getting the Rad-X in our systems.”

“Good idea…”

There was an abandoned building nearby where they could take a short breather before starting their dangerous hike, which was a relief for them both. It could be quite some time before they found a place of safety, at least however long it would take them to make it through The Glowing Sea and back. The goal was to get in, find this Virgil, and get out. No exploring, no detours, no nothing. Neither of them was willing to risk their life for any curiosities, much to MacCready’s relief, since Darla had a penchant for exploring every fucking ruined building she could find. The silence between them was thick and uneasy. The fear was so intense that they dare not speak. Darla didn’t want to scare MacCready away, and he didn’t want to sound like he was trying to talk her down from this again. Darla needed to do this, and MacCready was willing to follow. She’s done so much for him, so much more than most were ever willing to do. He couldn’t, and wouldn’t, leave her to do this alone.

“Heh, f-fuck...can’t stop shaking…”

MacCready glanced up from where he sat on the concrete floor nearby, hands thoroughly feeling over the fabric of his suit in search of any defects. Darla was pale, and there was a fear in her eyes that he wasn’t used to. Darla was always so stoic and brave in the face of danger, and that sureness is what made her such a good partner out here in the unforgiving Commonwealth. He was never worried that the woman would bolt in the face of danger or have any reservations about killing for their survival. But there was not a damn thing sure about what they were about to do, so he couldn’t blame her for looking like she was about to shit herself senseless. He longed to reach out and take her hand, to comfort her. He wanted to help melt that fear away. Fear didn’t suit Darla. God did it make her look so damn small.

“Hey, fear’s a good motivator. Keeps you on your toes. You know you’ll be fine when you get out there. Anticipation’ll kill ya. Just...try _noooot_ to think about it so much.”

Easier said than done. Dara snorted, trying to stifle a small sniffle, trying to keep herself together. It wasn’t easy. She was always having to hold herself together, and it drove her to tipping points that damn near shattered her. MacCready’s heart clenched. She wasn’t as good at keeping her pain hidden as she thought she was, or perhaps he had become attuned to picking it up. Since she left the vault, she’s carried so much pain, so much blame, but she pushes herself through it by keeping herself busy. He knew all too well from personal experience, however, that you could only run for so long. You can’t run from that pain forever before it spills over, seizing you, holding you hostage in it’s unforgiving clutches. This was the second time in these recent weeks the poor woman has become overwhelmed, an indication of just how long she’s shouldered far too many burdens for one person to handle.

Darla was no longer as focused on the task at hand as she should be. Letting even the smallest tear slip her notice could be a deadly mistake, given the high levels of radiation they were about to walk into. Their suits needed to be absolutely air-tight. Her thoughts were spiraling, and there was no stopping the crash that was about to happen. MacCready just couldn’t watch this anymore. Fuck protocol, fuck the fact that she was his boss, fuck trying to hide these feelings any longer. MacCready found himself scooting closer to Darla, taking her cold, shaking hand. Her automatic movements ceased, and her eyes turned down to the hand holding hers. It was calloused and rough, but warm and comforting. And that comfort, something that she hasn’t felt for so long, was what finally undid all of gates, the emotions flooding forth in a surge for which she couldn’t control.

MacCready was startled when a keening wail escaped her mouth, hot tears first stinging Darla’s eyes, then falling quickly down her face. After a hesitant moment, he pulled the sobbing woman tightly in his arms, and she pressed her face desperately against his chest, frantically seeking that comfort and security she’s been denied since setting foot into her new, hellish life. He knew this frantic need. He knew it from when he was a boy, living without parents, desperately wishing for comfort and security, desperately wishing he had safe arms to fall into on the hardest of days. It broke his heart, and left him wondering.

“Whoa, whoa, hey there...ssshhh...boss...Darla…I’ve got you...”

Darla needed this, he knew that. She was one of the damn strongest women he’s ever met. Where others would have curled up in a hole to die in the same situation, or never stepped out of that vault at all, Darla pushed ever forward, and my god MacCready admired her for that. Her strength and determination sometimes even pushed him on during the hardest days, and now he can finally return the favor. Now, he can be the strength and support she needed where no one else had thought to offer it. The sobbing continued for some time, the tears soaking through MacCready’s duster. Eventually, Darla’s cries grew hoarse and raspy, then they quieted altogether. She still shook in his arms, but he could feel the tension leaving her body ever so slightly. A weight was finally lifted from her shoulders, and the fact that he could provide that for her was gratifying. She remained pressed against him, touch starved and needy. He’d find it adorable if it weren’t for the fact it was so sad.

“See? You’re fine. I got you”

A small sniffle, then a coo came from Darla, her face still pressed against his chest. She swiped a hand across her face in a feeble attempt to clean away the tears, succeeding only in smudging it in with the film of dust peppered across her skin. Her deep blue eyes turned up to his now, a small, shy smile playing on her lips. It was always unsettling for MacCready to see her in a state of vulnerability, but a little bit of bashfulness was something that made his heart flutter in a new sort of way, a way that was not entirely uncomfortable, and yet it was so frightening. This side of her is something no one but he has seen, and damn did it make him feel special. He smiled in return, with a little more confidence, but he could feel how his cheeks burned, that confession he has been wrestling with for some time dancing on his tongue. He couldn’t. He shouldn’t. But here, on the precipice of certain, immense danger, he felt the time was right. He had to tell her, before it became too late. She needed to know.

“Darla…”

MacCready let a thumb caress the woman’s cheek, his eyes intense, burning with admiration and something stronger that she couldn’t quite place.

“Look, I uh...sh-sh--I’m not really uh...good at things like this. Never have been. Lucy, she uh...she was actually the one to kind of opened up first, between us. When we uh...when we became a thing, she was kind of the one to start this conversation because I was too fucking chicken-shit. I was too stubborn or something, or wanted to be this hardened waster after leaving Little Lamplight. I thought I had to be. Didn’t think, you know, all this touchy-feely crud was something a man would admit to out here. Thought it was a sign of weakness. I never realized until Lucy came along, that it’s actually really... _brave_ to open yourself up and be vulnerable and trust someone so much...christ, I’m rambling, huh?”

MacCready ran a nervous hand through his hair, chewing at the inside of his cheek until he could find the right words to say. How do you tell a woman like this how much they mean to you? That they gave you another reason to live and push on. That you would do anything to protect them, relieve them of their pain, make sure they never felt abandoned again. They had been two lost, lonely souls, and against all odds, fate brought them together so that they may save each other’s lives. Without Darla, the cure may not be on its way to Duncan, and MacCready may have lost what remained of his family. She made sure he didn’t have to suffer that loss, and perhaps with her, he could build a new family. Just maybe…

Oh fuck it all, the words wouldn’t come, and MacCready had always been a man of action, anyways. He abandoned his thoughts, taking Darla’s chin in his free hand, then he pressed his lips awkwardly against hers. It had been some time since he’s kissed a woman, and he was never the most suave lover in the world (Lucy used to tease him like hell about that, but she adored his awkward nature when it came to romance). Hell, he was about to pull away, feeling rather foolish, when Darla leaned in to return the intimate gesture. Her lips were soft and sure, guiding him affectionately, and MacCready was all too willing to follow her lead. Their hands roamed over backs and limbs, grasping at hair, feeling, each needing this closeness. MacCready was the first to pull away, pressing his forehead against hers, eyes wide with wonder and hesitant hope. Did she...

“Darla...I wanted you to know, before we, you know, walk into the pits of hell, that...that you mean more to me than I...after Lucy, I never thought I’d find someone who could make me feel so safe, so cared for. It’s cutthroat out here, it’s kill or be killed, but you...you hired me. I was hired to help you with whatever hair-brained scheme you needed me to help you accomplish, yet you helped me without a second thought. You didn’t have an obligation to do that, and didn’t have to care, but...you did. I’m not just in your debt for all you’ve done, I...you are one of the most important people in my life. I want to keep you close. If you’d let me, I’d follow you to the ends of the Earth. I...I need you Darla. Not just as a partner in crime...and not just as a...friend...I would like you in my life as something...w-well something…”

MacCready couldn’t finish. His heart was beating much too fast, and he felt as if he might actually be sick. Wouldn’t that be fucking smooth, throwing up all over the woman he was confessing his love to? He couldn’t keep himself from shaking, leaving himself open and bare before Darla, waiting for a reaction, any sort of reaction. Fuck, he was scared. Scared he fell too fast, scared he was pushing this too quickly, scared she had never intended to find love again and didn’t feel the same way. But he didn’t have to sit in suspense for long. A bright smile pulled to Darla’s lips, and her cheeks burned a deeper shade of red, which he didn’t think was possible, considering the fact that kiss left her rather bashful as it was. For just a moment she averted her eyes, then she hooked her arm around his neck, the other hand carding through his brown hair, which elicited a soft sigh from her favorite mercenary..

“R.J. ...I...you know, someone I could love and cherish this much...this isn’t something I thought I’d ever find when I stepped out of the vault. I...I just wanted to survive, I just wanted to find my son. After that, I didn’t know what I’d do. This world was so foreign...I thought that maybe, I’d find my son...then die with him, unable to live in this wasteland with nothing but memories of my old life. But I think I’ve found that this world, this new life...it’s not that miserable. It doesn’t have to be. I’ve found friends, new family, a life...one that I want to spend with you…”

Now they were both grinning like idiots. Two bashful, silly idiots. They shared a small, nervous laugh, holding each other close, taking comfort in the safety and warmth. Darla finally stopped shaking, and her drive and focus finally returned. He could see that strength and determination returning, the fear and vulnerability melting away. Sure, they were both still pretty nervous about the journey ahead, but having each other to walk this dangerous journey, they felt like they could survive, and actually find the man they sought so that they may come one step closer to solving the mystery surrounding Darla’s son and her being preserved by The Institute.

MacCready and Darla, both with renewed vigor, went back to the task at hand, all the while talking about their pasts, their families, their hopes and dreams. And for once, they both spoke fondly of the future. Neither of them thought there would be a damn thing to look forward to, but now they had each other and the world at their feet. Who knows what was in store for them, but it didn’t matter, so long as they could go into it side-by-side. So side-by-side they walked, hazmat suits donned, staring into the bright green horizon. It was ominous, daunting, and promised hazard and possible death. It was no wonder this Virgil character, if he was out there, chose to hide here. There were few, if anyone out in the Commonwealth, willing to to venture into a place plagued with so much radiation.

MacCready could hear Darla take a sharp intake of breath, though he couldn’t see her face because of the fog over the helmet shielding her head, her breath hot and terrified. He knew the fear was coming back. He knew she was starting to hesitate again, so he reached out to grasp her hand, squeezing it tightly. Darla squeezed his hand in return, turning her head to face him. She was trying to look at him, obviously, but whether she could see through the fogged up helmet was another thing entirely. Not that it mattered. MacCready knew she was trying to find reassurance, and reassurance is what he would give to her.

“We can do this. We will do this. We’ll find this fucker, and we’ll find your son, I promise.”

It wasn’t a promise he could make and actually keep, MacCready knew this. Any number of things could go wrong, but the words alone were enough to soothe Darla’s mind and strengthen her resolve. He imagined that she was smiling now, and she released his hand, taking a step forward towards the bright green horizon before them. Together, they could do this. Together, they could do anything. And so into The Glowing Sea they went, hoping beyond hope, that Virgil was there, and that Darla would be one step closer to finding her son. She gave him a future with Duncan, so he would do anything to give her the future with Shaun that she deserved.


End file.
